Douglas L. Simmons
Abecedarian
Presents:
...if only for a moment.
- --Doug L. If you please: "Continue the journey...."
Why is there always money for war but not for education?
Because knowledge empowers the student and denies the tyrant his greatest power, the ability to lie...
Instead of spending your life worrying about money, spend your money and have a life...
"Just smile at people and pretend you like them, after a while you might find that you really do."
- - -
08-15-2013
08-15-2013
...what stays in Vegas never happened.
If it has my name on it I wrote it. Enclosed in quotation marks if someone else wrote it and credit given to the author. As for the information, it's called researching the news, which (to my knowledge) is not to be found on FOX, NBC, CBS or ABC. I have my sources...
08-15-2013
"There's only two kinds of people in this world, and you ain't one of them."
--Dolly Parton
An Apple a day keeps the Microsoft away.
By embarking on a mission to free the world of all the other tyrannies, our government has become the greatest tyrant of all time...
“I know it’s been a good day when I don’t have to unleash the flying monkeys.”
--the Wicked Witch
The only thing better than food is...free food!
Remember, when you want a handout from Uncle Sam, he doesn’t foot the bill, the taxpayers do.
Terrorists go to school and learn to speak English so they can inhabit this country in order to inhibit it.Perhaps if immigrants went to school and learned to speak English they could inhabit this country without inhibiting it.
Handsome and gorgeous run rampant in our family...I just checked the mirror...
“I must write it all out, at any cost. Writing is thinking. It is more than living, for it is being conscious of living.”
--Anne Morrow Lindbergh
--Anne Morrow Lindbergh
There's a light up ahead, I hope it's the end of the tunnel and not a train...
It's a sad comment on one's life when today's greatest achievement was finding a new ring tone......and then texting the great news to the world at large.
--Doug L.
--Doug L.
"...So where are the strong; and who are the trusted, and where is the harmony?"
"What's so funny about peace love and understanding?"
--Nick Lowe
--Nick Lowe
What is a "Skype"? Can it fly? Does it tweet?
Of course, the one I've always wanted is the one they don't make anymore...
It's easy to tell how many friends a person on facebook has.All the pictures they post of themselves are taken at arms length.
--Doug L.
Tonight on the news Jerry Taft said, "Chicago is the coldest city in the country."...like that's news.
--Doug L
--Doug L
Bees don't bother me...more than once...
Why is it called Hockey anyhow?
What the heck is a "hockey"?
Isn't that something you spit..?
...oh yea, that's a hocker...
...and who is Stanley? Never heard of the guy...
...and what kind of cup is that anyway?
It looks like it's upside-down
What the heck is a "hockey"?
Isn't that something you spit..?
...oh yea, that's a hocker...
...and who is Stanley? Never heard of the guy...
...and what kind of cup is that anyway?
It looks like it's upside-down
-I think they all got drunk at the party, turned the punch bowl over and decided to use it for a trophy.
Now they're stuck with the stupid looking thing.
Those guys have taken so many shots to the head they don't even know what a cup is supposed to look like.
The whole thing sound "hokey" to me.
--Doug L
Now they're stuck with the stupid looking thing.
Those guys have taken so many shots to the head they don't even know what a cup is supposed to look like.
The whole thing sound "hokey" to me.
--Doug L
A fellow I know, nicknamed "Gentleman Jim" by his friends, once advised me; "When someone criticizes me I pause a moment and then respond. Thank you for the observation. I will consider the merits of what you say and, if you are correct, will attempt to better myself."
A single act of kindness on your part may change the life of another person.
That one single act will likely not effect great change upon your own life.
However; that same kindness repeated with each person you meet will dramatically transform the world around you...
...and will, indeed, change your own life as well.
--Doug L.
--Doug L.
In Chicago, where millions live in a "Wrigley" Field of Dreams, they've managed, for a brief moment, to forget the decades of despair as Knights in icy armor (the icons of redemption) return from the Crusades to parade about the streets, while stealthily secreting their plunder from bar to bar in celebration.
The fandom, awakened from the doldrums of despondency, rise up to follow their momentary heroes and "Illinois Jones" is off on a search for the "Holy Cup"...
Meanwhile, back in the Windy City...A whispered, "Maybe next year..," echoes off the empty bleachers as the boys of summer stand alone on the "diamond in the rough", un-adored, forgotten, shivering in the wind and rain...
--Doug L.
The fandom, awakened from the doldrums of despondency, rise up to follow their momentary heroes and "Illinois Jones" is off on a search for the "Holy Cup"...
Meanwhile, back in the Windy City...A whispered, "Maybe next year..," echoes off the empty bleachers as the boys of summer stand alone on the "diamond in the rough", un-adored, forgotten, shivering in the wind and rain...
--Doug L.
You may think you look "Thug-Like-For-Real" parading around out here dressed like a fool...
...with your ass hanging out...
...you don't.
That's OK though, you should get in all the practice you can, so that when you go to prison for real you know the dress code for real and can properly advertise that you will trade your booty for protection from the like -
...you don't.
That's OK though, you should get in all the practice you can, so that when you go to prison for real you know the dress code for real and can properly advertise that you will trade your booty for protection from the like -
"REAL THUGS".
...life is what smacks you up-side the head while you are taking pictures of your self with your smart phone.
"Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it."
-Mahatma Gandhi
-Mahatma Gandhi
Instead of trying to walk in my shoes, try this for starters, walk in the shoes you're wearing.
--Doug L.
--Doug L.
"Imagine all the people..."Imagine a world in which each of us encouraged others to tell us how we could live a better life instead of assuming we are perfect and telling them how they should live theirs?
--Doug L.
Maybe they'll send a replacement.
Maybe he'll get here in time.
--Doug L.
--Doug L.
Practice practicing.
--Doug L.
--Doug L.
There are some people who simply beg the question: "Were you born this way or, did you have to take lessons?"
--Doug L.
--Doug L.
1st lesson of leadership: You make your own Karma.
2nd lesson of leadership: Karma Sucks.
3rd lesson of leadership: You made it.
--Doug L.
2nd lesson of leadership: Karma Sucks.
3rd lesson of leadership: You made it.
--Doug L.
- - - Never do unto others...
...something they might make you undo.
--Doug L.
First rule of leadership: Everything is your fault.
--Doug L.
Hiding the light of others under a bushel will not make your light shine brighter in the world.It will simply leave you that much closer to the darkness.
--Doug L.
LIFE LINES:
There are lines in every person's life.Sometimes you cross them, sometimes you draw them. Either way, they define (from that moment on) everything which follows.
--Doug L.
One deftly wielded poison pen whose strokes are made in public effects far greater potential for change than all the venomous letters written and sent in secret ever will.
--Doug L.
Zen... Be the pain... It works for me...
...little has changed throughout the ages. Lemmings remain lemmings.
One Dictionary defines lemmings as:
... a member of any large group following an unthinking course towards mass destruction
... a member of any large group following an unthinking course towards mass destruction
I'm going to add a horn replacement rider to my insurance policy. I've worn out two horns already this year alerting texters that the light has been green for some time now...
--Doug L.
Common Sense: A necessary commodity for those not shielded by money or power.
--Doug L.
I've accomplished most of the things I wanted to do in life, except go to the moon...
...Perhaps if my name had been Alice?
--Doug L.
Having spent a life well lived I can only hope that posterity will judge it a life lived well.
--Doug L.
"The accepted standard states that in a relationship both partners must give - 50/50."
"That's unacceptable, if things are 50/50 then each person is only going halfway."
"In truth, the standard for success is 100/100, you must both be all in, 100% to succeed."
"That's unacceptable, if things are 50/50 then each person is only going halfway."
"In truth, the standard for success is 100/100, you must both be all in, 100% to succeed."
--Pat Byrne
I have no intentions, good or bad. I just am.
Independent, irresponsible. An absolute monarchy is one in which the sovereign does as he pleases so long as he pleases the assassins.
Not many absolute monarchies are left (the assassins weren't all that pleased).
Many absolute monarchies have been replaced by limited monarchies, where the sovereign's power for evil (and for good) is greatly curtailed (and the assassins are unemployed);
The absolute best replacement being the Republics, which are governed by chance, a far more benevolent tyrant than bad (or good) intentions.
--unknown author
So I said to him, "I know this really good tattoo artist. You could have him tattoo it right across your forehead in big bright letters."
"That way, people would know right off and you wouldn't have to act like this all the time..."
--Doug L.
Quite likely you are constantly being asked to copy and paste things by those who endlessly copy and paste everything that pops up on their news feed, as this is their only method of interacting socially, since they have nothing original to say...
I was ask to copy and paste this by a friend in need of more things to copy and paste. Under most circumstances my friendship does not extend to point of copying and pasting, however...
She played the trump card, stating that if I did not copy and paste it would indicate that I hate bacon and thus the monsters would win...
While I could not bring myself to simply copy and paste, I did use her original thesis as a guide and drafted this quick brief simply to defend myself from defamation of character.
I could not live in a world where anyone (even total strangers) for one moment believed that I hate bacon...
On second thought; perhaps the monsters have already won, as I have been backed into a corner and (after a fashion) compelled to copy and paste...
...if this goes on it could make me hate bacon.
--Doug L.
An "Educated Ass" is, at heart, still just an ass...
Good help is hard to find.
Consulting Engineers are a dime a dozen...
Mothers day - May 14, 1944
(somewhere in Germany)
"ALL RIGHT YOU MOTHERS, LETS TAKE THIS HILL!"
--unknown Platoon Sgt.
A 105 year old woman claims to have lived so long because she eats bacon every day.
So, I conclude that if I add lettuce, tomato, mayonnaise, some cheese and put it all on Rye bread I should make it to at least 152...
As Dean Koontz says, "Cholesterol doesn't stick if you have the right attitude"
--Doug L.
I'll say this one more time...
Hippopotami are not cute, consider that even crocodiles are afraid of them and will not eat baby Hippo's, even if one is sitting on its head...
--Doug L.
When my son was young I said, "Stand tall Son and always look the other fellow in the eye."
So he stood tall and now I have to look up...
Definitive proof that carrying a gun does not prevent violent crimes.
Every policeman in the country (except Barney Fife) carries a loaded gun.
Hasn't deterred the violence one iota...
--Doug L.
"It's so nice to be insane--
--no one asks you to explain."
--Helen Reddy
"...if it's foaming at the mouth you have to shoot it!"
--Stephin King
If the only way you know how to address the world is with four letter words....
....perhaps you should learn to count all the way to ten before speaking!
In much of my writings, I refer often to the (movie) Wizard Of Oz when giving examples of the way we behave and the magic which often touches our lives--many times without our even being aware of the touch.
Somehow, it does not surprise me overmuch that every one (except me, I predicted the event {see rule62 - Phiel-awe-so-flee}) was so shocked when the people of Iraq rejoiced at the downfall of Saddam Hussein.
Once again the truth was found in the tale of a magic land called Oz.
How could we believe in the land of Oz and not know that others who face us with fear in their eyes do not fear us, instead they fear the wickedness which has them under sway.
Fear that the magic is only fiction, that the desert might drink the waters of freedom before the witch can melt away....
I am not surprised at the rejoicing in the streets of Baghdad.
Click your heels together and repeat after me...
"All hail! The witch is dead! The wicked, old witch! The witch is dead!"
"There is no place like home..."
"There is no place like home..."
"There is no place like home..."
Sign On A Church:
Hallelujah! He is risen...
...Bingo, 5pm every Monday.
Do not laugh at life...
...it might laugh back.
04-21-2002
Some one, told me today that the biologists have come up with a new theory as to the origins of man.
They think we may have all evolved from sponges...
...that would explain the behavior of many members of our society!
I am (at the time of writing) by trade, a "Crane Repairman", and perform maintenance on the electrical, mechanical and hoisting systems of overhead cranes.
Machines which range in height above ground level from 30 to 100+ feet.
Not exactly the most mundane job in the world.
This job entails many hazards; electrocution, crushing injuries, the hazard of falling, explosions...
Over the course of my career, myself and my fellows have suffered all of these hazard many times.
Some at the cost of their lives.
Through the years many crafts (including my own) have suffered from wages which have not kept up with the inflation in the general cost of living.
These losses are due, in part, to few, or no, pay raises and indeed, in many instances, pay cuts. Also, much of the available overtime work, by which one might supplement one's income, has gone the way of the dinosaur because of automation and reduced maintenance of existing equipment...
The other day the crew I am a part of was returning from a job. On our way back to the shop, our supervisor - unsatisfied with the general lack of enthusiasm we had shown while performing the job - called us all a bunch of clowns!
I thought this over for a moment and replied: "I would imagine that, in the circus, the tight wire walkers and the fliers on the high trapeze are paid a bit more money than are the clowns standing safely below on the ground."
"Perhaps, boss you are getting what you pay for: Clown Work for Clown Pay!"
Why is it that, after the TV sales departments of our local malls have convinced us all to go out and buy thirty seven inch televisions, that the major networks, and many of the cable stations, then decided to show most all of their programing in "wide screen" format. Thereby shrinking the picture down to a size equivalent to the old twenty inch set we had to begin with.
Exactly what is it they think they have accomplished...
...aside from ticking off most of their viewers?
Such a shame; I didn't have a thought for "o-two, o-two, o-two!"
I heard this from one of my college professors': "Sexual attraction is a form of 'ecstatic electricity'. It is caused by two objects rubbing together."
Having come upon a group of workers standing about in the shop laughing together, their boss stated:
"Wages are paid to entice people into doing that which they would not otherwise find enjoyable. If you fellows are having this much fun, you must be overpaid!"
"Wages are paid to entice people into doing that which they would not otherwise find enjoyable. If you fellows are having this much fun, you must be overpaid!"
My oldest sister (Selina) sent me this really short story. I am not at all certain exactly what she meant by it, I find it interesting; just the same.
"When I was a kid we had a sand box.
It was a quicksand box.
I was an only child...
...eventually."
"What the world needs now is...
...a Love Bomb."
I give credit for this original quote to my good friend; John Black:
"In the second place:
Should you find that you have ventured deep enough into the storm to consider sending out an S.O.S. (Save Our Ship)...
In the first place:
It is quite possible that the thing which prevented you from simply going around the storm to begin with is that you were already S.O.S. (Stuck On Stupid)..."
I overheard someone attribute this thought to the Celts: "All teachers should be poets; for any knowledge which does not first pass through the heart, while on its way to the brain, is a dangerous thing."
Tell me: Why is the one that is burned out always the last light bulb you check?
Ol' Sam 'as...
...been slammin';
Osama's...
...been lammin'.
Obama's...
...been plannin';
Osama's...
...un-mannin'.
Many people in the USA today have developed the philosophy that they should be able to "get over" in life, rather than work their way through it.
From school (find the answers on the Internet, copy and paste), to making a living (win the lotto, sue a big company, get paid to surf the net....), to hoping the aliens will land and give us all the answers (so we don't have to work so hard at it).
Should they ever actually come down, to give us the answer to the Universe, I would imagine any wise space visitors would simply quote one of Robert A. Heinlein's favorite sayings:
"There ain't no such thing as a free lunch!"
--Doug L.
In the country, in which I live, many of us own firearms.
The police have firearms.
The criminals have firearms.
The citizens have firearms.
People who are not citizens have firearms.
Most of us do not carry our guns around with us.
In many cases, our guns are stashed in closets, under beds, in gun cabinets...gathering dust.
We do not need to go about armed in my country.
It is the land of the free.
And, what many who do not live here often forget, the home of the brave...
When that freedom is threatened the brave will dust off those guns, find the ammunition, and take aim.
I live in the United States of America.
My family came to America from Germany.
Others came from England, Italy, Scotland, China, Egypt, Australia, Sweden, Uganda, South Africa, Israel, Saudi Arabia, Russia, Iran, Japan...
There is a lady standing in New York harbor. She came to America from France.
She has stood in silence for many years. Gazing upon the gateway into the land of freedom. She knows much about tears.
Across the bay, on Ellis Island, she saw them shed for years.
Tears of joy, tears of sadness.
Tears of pain and tears of gladness.
She has millions of children.
Many of them are adapted orphans.
Orphans who ran, grateful, to the comfort of her open arms.
She lifts her lamp beside the golden door.
She welcomes all upon her gentle shore.
She welcomes those whom others want no more.
Especially the oppressed and wretched poor.
And, indeed, as any mother would, she knows about tears.
She is crying now for all of her wounded children.
And, indeed, as any mother would, she knows about fear, fear for the safety of her children.
She is afraid now.
She knows about tears.
She shed them for her sons and daughters who, in times past, were called to shed their precious blood to nourish the tree of freedom.
She has stood in silence for many years. Watching over her children as they ran and played freely in the bounty of her land, basking in the glow of her love.
She may break that silence now...and shed more tears.
She might well speak and, calling her rabble of orphans to arms, invoke a mothers wrath upon the wicked of the world.
Looking across the harbor, watching her children bleed, she is filled with fear.
Not for herself.
No.
She must only bear the burden of their pain.
She knows the burden they must bear.
She is afraid.
As any mother would, she does not wish this duty upon her children.
She knows the burden they must bear.
They have born it before; and born it well.
"Stand tall my children!" Liberty calls.
"Go now, and ensure that your children may also walk the streets of gold without fear. Above all else, defend this gateway that I shine my light upon. So that any other orphan who wishes to join my family may enter here. For, without this gateway, none of you would have a home."
"I lift my lamp beside the Golden Door. My door is always open, lighting the way to the land of plenty. I give this gift freely to all who will come inside."
"To those who do not understand, who mistake kindness for weakness, who live under the burden of tyranny, who would sacrifice my precious children, I give only pity."
"To my children I give the burden of freedom. As you enjoy it, so too must you protect it."
"You have taken the hit."
"Now...."
"Stand and deliver!"
"I will continue to lift my lamp."
"Watching...."
"Weeping..."
"Shedding tears of sadness, but not for you, my children. I weep for your enemies; who could have so freely entered here. Who, so easily, could have been your brothers."
Shortly after the fall...
...not long before the "foot fall".
- - -
October 24, 2000
What You Will Be?
The police have firearms.
The criminals have firearms.
The citizens have firearms.
People who are not citizens have firearms.
Most of us do not carry our guns around with us.
In many cases, our guns are stashed in closets, under beds, in gun cabinets...gathering dust.
We do not need to go about armed in my country.
It is the land of the free.
And, what many who do not live here often forget, the home of the brave...
When that freedom is threatened the brave will dust off those guns, find the ammunition, and take aim.
I live in the United States of America.
My family came to America from Germany.
Others came from England, Italy, Scotland, China, Egypt, Australia, Sweden, Uganda, South Africa, Israel, Saudi Arabia, Russia, Iran, Japan...
There is a lady standing in New York harbor. She came to America from France.
She has stood in silence for many years. Gazing upon the gateway into the land of freedom. She knows much about tears.
Across the bay, on Ellis Island, she saw them shed for years.
Tears of joy, tears of sadness.
Tears of pain and tears of gladness.
She has millions of children.
Many of them are adapted orphans.
Orphans who ran, grateful, to the comfort of her open arms.
She lifts her lamp beside the golden door.
She welcomes all upon her gentle shore.
She welcomes those whom others want no more.
Especially the oppressed and wretched poor.
And, indeed, as any mother would, she knows about tears.
She is crying now for all of her wounded children.
And, indeed, as any mother would, she knows about fear, fear for the safety of her children.
She is afraid now.
She knows about tears.
She shed them for her sons and daughters who, in times past, were called to shed their precious blood to nourish the tree of freedom.
She has stood in silence for many years. Watching over her children as they ran and played freely in the bounty of her land, basking in the glow of her love.
She may break that silence now...and shed more tears.
She might well speak and, calling her rabble of orphans to arms, invoke a mothers wrath upon the wicked of the world.
Looking across the harbor, watching her children bleed, she is filled with fear.
Not for herself.
No.
She must only bear the burden of their pain.
She knows the burden they must bear.
She is afraid.
As any mother would, she does not wish this duty upon her children.
She knows the burden they must bear.
They have born it before; and born it well.
"Stand tall my children!" Liberty calls.
"Go now, and ensure that your children may also walk the streets of gold without fear. Above all else, defend this gateway that I shine my light upon. So that any other orphan who wishes to join my family may enter here. For, without this gateway, none of you would have a home."
"I lift my lamp beside the Golden Door. My door is always open, lighting the way to the land of plenty. I give this gift freely to all who will come inside."
"To those who do not understand, who mistake kindness for weakness, who live under the burden of tyranny, who would sacrifice my precious children, I give only pity."
"To my children I give the burden of freedom. As you enjoy it, so too must you protect it."
"You have taken the hit."
"Now...."
"Stand and deliver!"
"I will continue to lift my lamp."
"Watching...."
"Weeping..."
"Shedding tears of sadness, but not for you, my children. I weep for your enemies; who could have so freely entered here. Who, so easily, could have been your brothers."
Shortly after the fall...
...not long before the "foot fall".
"Now that you have been all that you can be, try being the best that you can be."
--Randy Seabolt
- - -
October 24, 2000
Down Hill
--Randy Seabolt
I had this thought some time ago (07-16-96) at that time, I was declining.
"Downhill is not so bad...
...it's the angle of descent that matters!"
As a result of accidents, the collar bone is the one most frequently broken. I do not know, but it is possible that the nose might well be second on the list. Probably a different list...
...as noses are usually not broken by accident.
Possibly, the single greatest disadvantage of being homeless and living beneath a bridge in a cardboard box is a circumstance which plagues man in all walks of life:
Just when you don't have two pennies to rub together, your wife will decide she wants a bigger box.
(Under a nicer bridge.)
- - -
August 24, 2000 - 6:59pm
Revenge
Just when you don't have two pennies to rub together, your wife will decide she wants a bigger box.
(Under a nicer bridge.)
The best way to get revenge against your enemies is: Out live them.
That's how the mammals got here you know.
Ask the Dinosaurs.
Basking in the warm Jurassic sun, fat and lazy, feasting on the bounty which grew uncultivated in the lush tropical climate, the Dinosaurs looked down with contempt upon the furry little creatures who scurried about beneath their feet.
Who were forced to flee and hide in caves or holes in the ground.
Little funny looking soft hairy things (although they were a tasty after dinner treat) who cowered in the presence of the Terrible Lizards that owned the land.
Then the first winter came...
- - -
August 17, 2000 - 6:12pm
Circus
That's how the mammals got here you know.
Ask the Dinosaurs.
Basking in the warm Jurassic sun, fat and lazy, feasting on the bounty which grew uncultivated in the lush tropical climate, the Dinosaurs looked down with contempt upon the furry little creatures who scurried about beneath their feet.
Who were forced to flee and hide in caves or holes in the ground.
Little funny looking soft hairy things (although they were a tasty after dinner treat) who cowered in the presence of the Terrible Lizards that owned the land.
Then the first winter came...
...and I quote:
"Much like a circus, marriage has three rings:
The engagement ring.
The wedding ring.
The suffer ring.";
end quote...
Is this: "The beginning of the end?"
Or: "The end of the beginning?"
Maybe it is: "Beginning to begin!"
Perhaps it is simply: "End to end."
Oh well. All we may ever know for certain is that: "In the beginning, was:"
The End.
That statement may not seem to make sense (in the beginning) but - once you ponder it - I'm sure you will get it (in the end).
--Doug L.
Drive back by to witness more interesting observations at this intersection...
Another time...
...Doug L.
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An astute writer once advised all readers: "If you are reading and come upon a word which you do not know the meaning of, immediately, go to the dictionary and find out. Else you might well miss the single most important message in the book!" I believe this advice could indeed apply to every aspect of our lives. Dictionary.com...don't leave your homepage without it!
